I'm alive!!!!

I was driving to Planet Organic today in this wild winter weather, and I felt good. I mean GOOOOOD. I turned up the radio and sang my heart out, celebrating how good and alive I feel!!!! Tonight we watched a movie that really resonated with me, "Things To Do". I am so ready to live my life over, start a soap box race in my neighborhood, do all the whacky things that come to mind and live life, have fun, and enjoy every moment. I feel like I could shout it from the rooftops. I feel lucky to have this new and maybe manic appreciation for life. We've all had those moments where suddenly and for no reason, we feel extreme bliss and happiness right? You just feel incredible, everything is alright, its the best you could feel. That's how I feel right now. I'm sure its just my body celebrating the goodness of recovering from chemo (finally a week later)...but this is also my new outlook on life.

Venturing outside

Holy blizzard! This snow is crazy, non-stop but I like it. I just wish I could enjoy it more, still not feeling 100% but I AM going to venture to Planet Organic today for groceries. Today I decided I had the energy to get back to my 'to do' list...things I want to do but keep putting off. This includes going to a toning circle which only happens once a month but I love it and find it so therapeutic...I went once but I'm hooked and need to get back into it. It was one of few things that when I did it, I KNEW it was for me. Transforming. I've marked off all the dates on my calendar to help remind me. That and a few medical seminars, one guy coming from California to talk about the fact that you aren't your genes, good news, change is possible and we can reverse disease! MY goal for sure. Another on vitamin D...I'm on a new life path physically, emotionally and spiritually and really just 'green' at the moment but trying to dive in and create my new world and the new me. I'll really fit in living in NM now, I'm one of those whacky, out-there people now! Off to the store I go.

Back on the right road

Well, the pizza was over rated, surprise surprise. And I did stay up all night on the couch with indigestion. Lesson learned. This morning I was craving grapefruit and the left over salad in the fridge, that was breakfast. And it was delicious! Its great to see that I really have transitioned into the veggie and raw life though. A reminder that I am making the right changes and feeding my body the right things so the cancer can't come back. I think I might head to the Farmer's Market on the weekend if its open this time of year. Wish I was feeling good enough to venture outside today but I'm not...I'm sick of feeling lousy! I cannot explain how excited I am to feel good every single day again.

Temporarily falling off the wagon

I ate raw and vegetarian the entire week (love it by the way and I'm proud of myself) but tonight is pizza and 'chicken kickers' night! I'm straying from my healthy path for but one night of glorious bread, sauce and meat! My heartburn is already at an all time high, I KNOW I'm going to pay for this and likely be sleeping sitting up all night, and yet I can't fight the temptation. I'm weak but...I'm totally OK with that!

Lightening up

I've been obsessing about lightening up my blog site...The black contrast was uber cool but not how I'm feeling on the inside. I feel light and want my life to be light. Feels good to brighten up the place, phew! A relief actually. Thoughts of the road kept my mind off of feeling overly nauseous all morning while laying bed...I basically drove myself all around New Mexico to my favorite places. I've also started to plan what to pack again, a good sign...that means its not that far away now. And since I'm on the 'eco' and 'green' kick as of last year (I even had a green built home all lined up to rent in NM) I'm now planning to scout out eco bedding and other earth friendly home products to take with me...it might be easy to find in Santa Fe, but where I'm going, I think it's better to come prepared with it! My sista in suburbia would be proud.

Middle of the road

Another round of chemo done (as of yesterday) and two more to go. It's a long and different road than I'm used to being on and one I don't prefer. The count DOWN is on now though and I like to think I'm almost through the worst. I do feel good today which is unexpected. And I'm not complaining. I keep going with the love and support of friends and family, and keep my sights on what's ahead...the incredible life ahead. I am grateful but anxious to really get my life started again. I have such a new appreciation and zest for life and a new insight. And it really is amazing to be a part of the love that comes in times of need, people are amazing and I have never felt so much love or such strength from it. It is more powerful than any medicine. I'm getting too sappy. I'm looking forward to a visit with a soul mate and friend this afternoon, and a milkshake. Nectar of the gods these days! Guess there are some perks to chemo? I can get away with straying from my new vegetarian, raw diet! That's all for now...

A Brand New Year

Hallelujah! It's 2009. Yessssss! While most people were getting ready to raise their champagne glasses minutes before midnight last night, I was washing my wig in the bathroom sink. Not the wild girl I used to be hey? Well, not last night anyway. In the spirit of things, I did have the channel set to 'Dick Clark's New Years Special', the gold standard in my opinion, but I missed the big ball drop. Couldn't manage to stay up until 1:00 a.m. since Dick Clark was on New York time and an hour later.

A brand new day. A brand new year. I feel big things coming my way, good things. This is the year I will finally make it back to New Mexico, keep up with the vegetarian and health goals, focus on running, and hopefully the gods are in my corner in terms of baby or babies. A million more things to see and do but those are the key ingredients for 2009. Big shift...BIG shift, and I am ready. Bring it on!