It doesn't feel real yet but I finally did what I should have done a long time ago (but wasn't ready to)...I actually resigned from AHS. I wrote and emailed my letter of resignation tonight so my manager has it first thing tomorrow morning. I have to admit, I was a bit nervous and hesitant to hit the 'send' button. My stomach was in my throat. Looks like my 3 month LOA is now long term. But I say cheers to the freedom from the clutches of AHS! I tell ya, I'm in New Mexico, the place they deem "the land of entrapment" because once you're here you never want to leave. Even when you do leave, you keep coming back. AHS was another land of entrapment, only polar opposite. You WANT to leave and NEVER come back but it sucks you in. A swirling drain of low morale, negativity, and stagnancy. Of course, that's just MY opinion. Its not where I belong or belonged. But I loved the work and my patients, and AHS was the only way to have that. And I really need to be GRATEFUL for everything positive that came from working there for over 7 years. Knowledge, growth, experience, memories, and some good people. And I AM grateful for all of that. I've done a lot of soul searching these past 3 months and I feel like the more I try to search for answers, the less they come. But when it came to imagining myself returning to work at AHS one more time, it was like I hit a wall and froze, feet stuck in quicksand. I just couldn't push myself past it. My internal radar was screaming, "danger, danger park ranger!". My gut KNEW it was not the right thing to do. And I am listening. Finally, I am listening. Its time to force myself out of my comfort zone, search for new opportunities, and chart a new course. When I really think about it, it feels refreshing to be honest. Like a jumping-into-a-swimming-pool-on-a-hot-day-and-coming-up-out-of-the-water refreshed. Tomorrow is a brand new day. I am free. It feels good. And I am learning to trust that things are going to be OK without AHS.
to a weekend in Santa Fe. I should do this more often! Inspired by my brilliant friend Maria who does this sort of thing at Tamaya Resort now and then. One decadent night at the El Dorado Hotel, a long stroll on the plaza (busy weekend because the Spanish Market is happening), dinner at La Casa Sena (La Cantina...fun dinner show), and a massage tomorrow with Navajo herbs blended by a medicine woman. Maybe a bite at the Cowgirl Cafe before heading back to ABQ tomorrow as well. Best idea ever. I love Santa Fe.
I loved my Emergency! weekend in L.A. county!!!! Seriously, I have no idea why being a crazy fan and hanging out at a 70s TV show event was so incredible but it was. It was just so much fun. The drive was long but I loved touring through new towns I hadn't seen, eating road trip food, and just feeling the freedom that a road trip brings with it. I was so excited and worked up by the time I got to Carson, CA. We immediately drove to the station house (Station 127 in real life) and to UCLA Harbor General Hospital (aka "Rampart"). I was doing a happy dance in front of the station. Waiting for the next day (event day) was like waiting for Christmas!!!! The security guys at the hospital thought I was a nut job bringing my camera in with me and they made me put it in the car before entering the hospital. I've learned that the outside of the hospital is probably all that they used for filming but it was still cool to wander through it. And we lucked out on event day. They expected maybe 1,000 people and there were about 3-4 times that many! We decided to walk to the event which was a blessing in disguise. We managed to get right in front of the station in the event area and watched everyone else who took the shuttle wait in a big line. They weren't allowed near the fire station until after the unveiling of the fire engine and squad car. But I was right there! Which meant I got to see it all up close and take great photos before the area and vehicles were swarmed with fans. AND the best part? We got into the line for souvenirs early without knowing that Randolph Mantooth and Mike Stoker were at the end signing autographs. We only waited about 20 minutes and everyone else had to wait 3 HOURS in line. The line up didn't stop until 4:00 when the place shut down. But these guys were true to their fans and didn't leave until everyone had their autographs. The pool mixer was OK, met a great guy (ex state trooper of 26 years from S.C.) who hooked me up with a great book (a must buy for any fan) AND told us that the squad was driven to the hotel and IN the hotel. He directed us to a set of double doors and I nearly peed my pants. More up close and personal time with the squad car and the event guy even let me close to it and use the biophone that was used on the show. We sat and watched DVDs of the show on big screen in the same room as the squad and drank champagne. GREAT day. My only regret is that I didn't pay the $60 and write in about being the biggest fan. There were only 13 people who did and because there were so few...they all got a special plaque and driven in engine 51. The biggest fan (proudly from St. Albert, Alberta and fellow Canadian) won a Station 51 fireman hat and ride in the squad car! I figured I'd never win but should have tried anyway, dang it. That was my only sore point. The money goes to a good cause, restoration of engine 51. We toured the L.A. County Fire Museum the next day which was cool. I think we left that too early and missed more fan rides in the SQUAD but I'm blocking that out of my mind. Aaaagh...I would have LOVED that). But it was still the best weekend ever. THE BEST!!!!
by George Strait. Yes, I am still a hardcore fan and was so happy to hear this new one on the radio yesterday. It was love at first listen. Thought I'd share it with you, its a great song to live by and a great one to start your weekend with. As my sweet little German patient would say, "prost!" (a.k.a. salut, cheers). Enjoy!