So long AHS...

It doesn't feel real yet but I finally did what I should have done a long time ago (but wasn't ready to)...I actually resigned from AHS. I wrote and emailed my letter of resignation tonight so my manager has it first thing tomorrow morning. I have to admit, I was a bit nervous and hesitant to hit the 'send' button. My stomach was in my throat. Looks like my 3 month LOA is now long term. But I say cheers to the freedom from the clutches of AHS! I tell ya, I'm in New Mexico, the place they deem "the land of entrapment" because once you're here you never want to leave. Even when you do leave, you keep coming back. AHS was another land of entrapment, only polar opposite. You WANT to leave and NEVER come back but it sucks you in. A swirling drain of low morale, negativity, and stagnancy. Of course, that's just MY opinion. Its not where I belong or belonged. But I loved the work and my patients, and AHS was the only way to have that. And I really need to be GRATEFUL for everything positive that came from working there for over 7 years. Knowledge, growth, experience, memories, and some good people. And I AM grateful for all of that. I've done a lot of soul searching these past 3 months and I feel like the more I try to search for answers, the less they come. But when it came to imagining myself returning to work at AHS one more time, it was like I hit a wall and froze, feet stuck in quicksand. I just couldn't push myself past it. My internal radar was screaming, "danger, danger park ranger!". My gut KNEW it was not the right thing to do. And I am listening. Finally, I am listening. Its time to force myself out of my comfort zone, search for new opportunities, and chart a new course. When I really think about it, it feels refreshing to be honest. Like a jumping-into-a-swimming-pool-on-a-hot-day-and-coming-up-out-of-the-water refreshed. Tomorrow is a brand new day. I am free. It feels good. And I am learning to trust that things are going to be OK without AHS.

Love this new song...

by George Strait. Yes, I am still a hardcore fan and was so happy to hear this new one on the radio yesterday. It was love at first listen. Thought I'd share it with you, its a great song to live by and a great one to start your weekend with. As my sweet little German patient would say, "prost!" (a.k.a. salut, cheers). Enjoy!

http://kicks105.com/george-straits-here-for-a-good-time-new-song-spotlight-audio/

Next stop, California!

I am actually MORE excited about going to California for the Emergency! event in July than I was for my 40th birthday in Las Vegas. How hilarious is that?! My birthday was spectacular though. Small, quaint, and lived like a rockstar. The restaurant (Simon at The Palms) was gorgeous, very Palm-Springs-retro feel to it and delicious champagne and Bellini's. I'm a sucker for champagne. We glammed up and took a limo to and from the restaurant. It was a decadent night. The whole trip was fast and furious. We managed to get pool time, play the slots, eat at a few great restaurants, see the casinos, hang out downtown (Fremont Street), and of course shop at the outlet mall. Oh, and we rode on a float 30 feet above a casino with some pretty hot dancers. Hello 40! Next stop is Carson, CA baby. I'm a geek but so excited about seeing station 51, squad 51, the fire engine, and meeting some of the cast of Emergency! Johnny Gage (Randolph Mantooth) especially. He may be 30 years older but I still think its cool to meet a TV star from the 70s! And to get to see the whole place it was filmed at. Seriously, I do a happy dance whenever I think about it. I booked the hotel tonight, yow! Its been a great summer. Still need to come up with a plan for my future...I'm pretty happy where I'm at right now so its tough. Where's that crystal ball?

3 days until Vegas

Friday I will be on a plane to Las Veeeeeeegas! I arrive early enough in the morning to get to the hotel in plenty of time to spend the day at the pool. Forecast says the weather should be in the 90s, NICE. The rest of the weekend will be a blur of eating, shopping, and tootling the streets of Vegas, both the strip and Fremont Street. I bought a new brown dress and some gold, sparkly, strappy shoes that should help me celebrate turning 40 in classic hip and not old lady style (I'm hoping). I did make the mistake of getting my haircut in these days before my birthday. If I was back home it would have been fine, Tam my hair guy is AMAZING. However, I am here. And I took a risk. I now look like a cross between Pat Benetar, Justing Beiber, and a soccer mom. And I set myself back, way back, in the growing-my-hair-out department. I was SO close to breaking past the awkward stage and now...its back to short and choppy layers. I've already figured a way past the Beiber swoosh the hair stylist sent me home with. But I'm still struggling to make this hairdo seem feminine and pretty. Ugh. At least its not green right? Tomorrow I venture back to the same salon, only this time, for Rockstar toenails. I know! I hadn't heard of them either. They are colorful, sparkly, blingy, and last 2 months or longer! What more could a girl ask for? Gorgeous! Packing tomorrow or Thursday, and I'm all set and ready for my birthday weekend in Sin City. 40. Bring it.